Thursday, August 30, 2007

Today, I am grateful

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The following post is one of a series of posts appearing Monday through Friday on The Cancer Blog. This feature -- Today, I am grateful -- allows me to share with readers my appreciation for all the treasures in my life, both big and small. In my post-cancer world, I find It healing for my soul to be mindful of the good in my life. It is my pleasure to share my gratitude with you.

The night before my lumpectomy, way back in December 2005, I was consumed with fear, worry, and panic. Since I'd found it, the lump in my left breast had been sitting untouched for nearly two weeks. I imagined the mass spreading with each day and believed I could detect its growth each time I felt for it. A doctor told me if it was growing like I thought it was, my tiny pea-sized tumor would be the size of an apple within days.

My fears were unfounded and irrational. I know that now. But during the moments of uncertainty that filled my days between diagnosis and prognosis, I had no direction. I had only my wandering mind for company. The waiting really is the hardest part. Once faced with the specifics of our diseases, we can take action.

My cancer had not spread. My lymph nodes were clean; my margins clear. I still had to endure chemotherapy, radiation, and a year-long Herceptin therapy. But I didn't have to worry that my cancer was knowingly gaining momentum, only to land elsewhere.

For almost three years, my cancer has not returned.

Today, I am grateful my breast cancer did not spread.

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[Source: The Cancer Blog]

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